Oof.


First of all, I have a cold. I caught it from my poor father, who drove me to the doctor last week despite being sick. SJ and my grandmother caught it too. SJ getting it doesn’t really surprise me, and I have a compromised immune system, so no shocker there, but my grandmother rarely gets sick. Mercifully, Phire isn’t sick — at least not so far. He has a great immune system, so hopefully he won’t.

I got my grades back from the two peer review assessments for the first week for the courses I’m taking online. While I didn’t exactly do BADLY in the one, and I did well in the other, I did far worse than I expected in the one, and a little worse than I expected in the other one.

I have a doctor’s appointment tomorrow partially for the cold (because my Dad needed to go to his doctor to get prescription medicines for his) and partially because I need to get my script and my referral renewed for my wheelchair, which I thankfully only need to use some of the time. But because my sleep schedule has been all screwed up, I’m worried about making it there on time. I’m also not looking forward to hours of bus rides, waiting for buses, and walking to and from bus stops while I’m sick. I feel guilty because I’m probably get other people sick, and I’m worried because going to the doctor’s office might get me sick with something else — especially since I’m already dealing with a cold.

I still haven’t sent in my application to Berklee because I’m waiting on my friend to send in his recommendation letter for me and loan me the money for the application fee.

I didn’t celebrate Beltaine yet. Initially, I was going to do my ritual for it sometime during the week this week. Then, when plans to go to my Dad’s this past weekend fell through, I hoped to do it over the weekend. Then, of course, I got this cold. So that is delayed until I feel better.

Also probably delayed is the bloodwork I’m supposed to get done.

I had wanted to spend more time with the puppy after CampNaNoWriMo ended. It’s not that I’ve been ignoring her, or anything, and it’s certainly not like she’s neglected. But most of the walking her, playing with her, taking her out to pee and poop, feeding her, giving her water, and putting her to bed at night has fallen on the guys in April. Between CampNaNoWriMo, needing to replace her gentle leader, and those two bad health weeks I had in the middle of April, SJ and Phire have been doing most of the legwork. I planned to change that as soon as CampNaNoWriMon ended. Unfortunately, two days after it ended, I got my cold. By the third day after it ended, I could no longer pretend it was just allergies. On the bright side, at least it waited until after CampNaNoWriMo was over to kick in — and until we had money to buy OTC cold and flu treatments and we could afford bus passes for the month.

I also haven’t been able to practice for a few days and SJ, who is far better with keyboard than I am, hasn’t been able to help for a few days. I REALLY don’t like being sick.

Then, my friend, who has been interested in Paganism for a while, but who is only just starting to get into it now, sent me a text this morning asking for advice on how to do a ritual asap, ideally today. Like the title says, “Oof”. I did tell him that that isn’t the kind of thing that would get done in one day, even if I wasn’t sick. I did give him what advice I could, including some things I definitively don’t think he should do. And I spent the last several hours texting with him about it. I may have managed to annoy him, but I hope not. And I wasn’t trying to be critical, nor to say he shouldn’t do a ritual.

I don’t want to make it sound like it’s all bad. At least the cold is just a cold, not a flu, or an Addisonian related thing. And Phire doesn’t have it. I’m still riding the happiness high in a major way from completing CampNaNoWriMo, applying to college, and and taking the online courses.

Also, I have MAJOR good news. Phire is mostly in at Full Sail University! He started his orientation and month-long trial period today. It’s even more awesome, because he wasn’t sure everything would be finished pending by today, in which case, he would have had to wait an additional month to get started. But it’s done, he doesn’t have to wait, and as long as he does well, and he likes it there, next month he will officially be a student of Full Sail University for a Bachelor’s of Science in Music Business. I’m so proud of him, and so, SO happy. He’s also getting a new computer this week which will make his and my lives significantly easier.

He’s done with the computer for now, and my friend doesn’t seem to be texting me back at the moment, so I’m off to do some of my course work.

I sincerely hope all of you are well and that none of you have colds! 🙂

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Flamekeeping 9/13/14 to 9/14/14


I wanted to finish the “Where I’m At” series today, but I don’t think I have the energy. I also don’t think I have the energy to write either of the other posts I’ve had in mind for this blog. Or any of the other posts for my other blogs — especially not “Where I’m At” for AODA. So I’m posting a brief post here.

Yesterday and today are my first days back at Flamekeeping. I actually remembered that I was still Flamekeeping for Brighid today in addition to yesterday. That had become a real problem after I got sick, but before I set up Flamekeeping on my old phone. Then I got too sick to do it regularly, and then at all. Then, my old phone needed to be replaced and it was only recently that I figured out how to set up a way to keep track of Flamekeeping on my new phone.

With the help of my endocrinologist, a homepathic practicioner, a nutritionist, a lot of research, friends, family, and a battery of other doctors, my condition(s?) is/are getting under control. I’m gradually getting better, though “all the way better” probably isn’t ever going to be an option again this lifetime. But I’m hoping that I’ll be able to manage a return to Flamekeeping.

Yesterday, I was mindful of Flametending. I felt pretty head blind. Sometimes I am, sometimes I’m not. And I certainly don’t have a “God phone” the way some people do. (Though I do believe that we can all talk to the Gods and that they are generally inclined to listen. But that’s my UPG). But I’m not head blind often enough that when I am it’s kind of disconcerting. That might be a good thing, though. I was super jittery after the Gaia ritual and I’m usually not after working with her. Post ritual jitters are never a fun experience for me.

Anyway, yesterday, the main things I did Brighid and Flamekeeping wise were a little bit of knitting. And postponing the ritual and question I have for her until today when I realized I was too tired. The last part applies because it’s been my experience and observation that a lot of people’s Gods want them to take care of themself, including mine. And Brighid is really up there, as far as taking care of myself goes, with her associations with healing.

I did put away and organize a bunch of clutter yesterday and wrote in my journal, but those were both before my shift officially started.

Today I’m extremely pleased because I remembered that I was still Flametending and I lit the candle fairly soon after waking up today. I wrote in my journal, which wasn’t poetry or precisely creative, but it is writing. It also allows me to clear my head so I can be creative and it’s important to me. I also washed some of the dishes. Most of them, actually. And I was mindful of her while I was doing them and of my house, my family, myself, and taking care of us while I did it. Though I still didn’t like doing dishes any more than I normally do! :-p
Part of the way through my legs started shaking. I did a few more, but was mindful of my health and didn’t push myself.

I don’t know if I’ll do the ritual and question tonight or not. I wanted to and I was hoping to do it earlier in the day, but stuff came up and I was really not looking forward to it. So I may postpone that, especially because I’m not sure that I feel up to it. But if I don’t, I have to figure out what I’m doing tomorrow. That’s when the Cernunnos ritual is supposed to be. And I already have to try to get fasting bloodwork done tomorrow, which kind of messes up my day in regards to food and meds, so I probably won’t be at the top of my game tomorrow.

I’m using a red seven day candle and hoping to start using an oil lamp kind of deal soon. Though the red is beautiful and reminds me of her, and it’s a much better option than the one I was using before.

I’m hoping to get some more knitting done before my shift ends and I’d like to set air freshener cones near the litter boxes, which is something easy I can check off my list for today and something that falls squarely within the realm of house and home.

I wanted to write about the ritual calendar today, but I’m not sure I have it in me.

Also, off and on for the past few minutes, my phone has been making weird shrieking sound, which is kind of freaking my out. I have no idea why and it hurts my ears. It sounds almost exactly like the feedback you get if you plug two ends of a cable into an amplifier while it’s turned on. And Phire, my tech guru husband is (I believe) asleep, so I can’t ask him about it right now.

And…on that random note, I think I’m going to call it a day for blogging.